Disclaimer:
The experiences shared in this article are my personal testimony and reflect my own journey of faith, spiritual discernment, and relationship with God. They are not intended to define or explain the experiences of others, nor are they meant to persuade anyone to adopt my beliefs. Every person’s spiritual journey is unique. My intention is simply to share how God has worked in my life, the lessons I have learned through both difficult and joyful seasons, and how my faith in Jesus Christ has transformed me over time.
I do not wish to publicize the details of my personal story. I share only what is necessary to give context to my testimony, because my purpose is not to focus on my past, but on my relationship with God and how that relationship has shaped my journey.
Introduction
When people talk about the gift of lucid dreaming and spiritual discernment, they sometimes assume that these experiences automatically shape a person’s mental state or character. I would say, not exactly. It depends on the individual.
This is not an explanation of everyone else’s experiences. This is my personal journey.
Looking back, I can see how every stage of my life… from childhood until now… has shaped my understanding of faith, discernment, and my relationship with God.
My journey was not always clear. It began with confusion, a search for identity, fear, and unanswered questions. However, through every difficult season, I believe God was slowly guiding me toward truth, healing, and a deeper understanding of His presence.
The Voices I Never Understood
I met Jesus in a dream for the first time while I was in a hospital bed. He was smiling at me. The very next day, I was discharged from the hospital. The doctors and my mom believed it was a miraculous healing.
After that night, I began noticing inner voices.
At first, I believed they were similar to the stories shown in movies… one voice representing good and another representing evil. I thought they were simply my imagination, my thoughts, or a form of storytelling within my own mind.
However, as the years passed, my experience felt much deeper than that.
During my teenage years, I struggled with thoughts of making bad decisions.
One voice would tell me a plan.
Then suddenly, another voice would say:
“You must not.”
That second voice carried a feeling of peace. It was not frightening. Instead, it felt like a gentle pull away from danger, reminding me that I should continue living.
For many years, I thought I was simply inconsistent. I believed my emotions and thoughts were constantly contradicting each other.
Looking back, I began to understand those experiences differently.
I believed they were connected to something spiritual.
Dreams that Stayed With Me
Everything began to change after I moved to a new environment.
Not long afterward, I encountered Jesus for the second time through a dream.
He gave me a message that felt incredibly vivid and meaningful. Although I did not fully understand it at the time, I felt as though He wanted me to go somewhere.
For years, I wondered why that dream remained so clear in my memory.
I have many dreams of Jesus, angels, and various characters and scenarios.
In many of my dreams, I found myself flying, traveling through different places, and fighting with my bare hands, as though a higher power was guiding and protecting me.
Sometimes, I wished to remain in slumber, where I could enjoy the adventures of the dream world… an escape that often felt better than my reality.
That was why I loved sleeping. I stopped caring about what others thought of me; I simply enjoyed the peace and freedom I found in sleep.
I could control many aspects of my dreams.
These experiences felt incredibly real.
At the time, however, I did not understand what they meant.
I only knew that these dreams were different from the nightmares I experienced as a child.
A Difficult Season
Years later, I experienced what I now believe was a season of intense spiritual attack.
At first, I did not recognize what was happening.
The voices became stronger.
Confusion filled my mind.
Physical exhaustion and emotional stress slowly began consuming me.
It felt as though each day was draining my energy. My mind was constantly somewhere else, while my body continued moving through daily life as if on autopilot.
For the second time, I felt disconnected from the world around me.
Instead, I began searching for answers.
Then, the truths began revealing themselves, one after another.
Searching for Answers in the Wrong Places
For the first time in my life, I sought guidance from psychics and mediums.
I asked questions about my past, my future, and the unusual experiences I had carried since childhood.
At that time, I believed they were the only people who could understand what I was experiencing.
Some people told me I was clairsentient.
Others told me I was clairaudient.
Yet deep inside, it felt like those were not the answers I was seeking.
So, I continued searching.
I was fortunate to grow up in a financially stable family. Yet, despite having material things, I still felt an emptiness inside.
While many people see wealth as a blessing, I learned that material things cannot replace love, guidance, and emotional connection.
Although I never experienced financial hardship, I learned that having material comfort does not always mean having emotional security.
Others considered me fortunate.
However, I viewed life differently.
The year 2024 became one of the most difficult seasons of my life.
It felt as though my energy and strength were slowly being drained.
I was not myself.
Although I was aware of my actions, my decisions became clouded, and I made choices that did not reflect who I truly was.
However, as time passed, something began to feel wrong.
Little by little, I began noticing the quiet conviction of the Holy Spirit, even before I fully understood what it meant.
That conviction would eventually change the direction of my life.
Carrying a Battle Nobody Could See
During this time, I continued working normally.
To others, I may have appeared distracted or as someone who was making excuses.
However, they could not see the personal battle I was facing.
My personal life has always been separate from my work life.
I rarely share my deepest struggles with friends, family, or colleagues.
That was the first time I involved someone outside my personal circle.
Looking back, I am thankful for their willingness to listen.
I have always been a cautious person.
Growing up in a difficult environment taught me to observe carefully.
I pay attention to people’s actions, patterns, and behaviors.
I notice inconsistencies.
I can often sense when something feels wrong, even if I cannot immediately explain why.
However, I also learned that discernment must be balanced with humility.
It is not about judging people.
It is about seeking truth while protecting peace and maintaining healthy boundaries.
I often smile even when I am carrying pain inside.
Many people cannot read my emotions because I learned to hide my struggles as a way of coping.
Some say I look cold or intimidating because I appear indifferent, that is why I smile to soften my expression.
When I become comfortable with someone, I slowly open up.
However, I still choose carefully what I share.
If I sense unhealthy behavior or manipulation, I quietly create distance.
Not because I believe I am better than others, but because experience has taught me the importance of wisdom.
To some people, I may appear quiet, unaware, or even dense.
But in reality, I am often observing.
Listening.
Learning.
Recognizing the Truth
I asked God to guide me and reveal what was truly happening.
Through that experience, I began understanding that spiritual experiences alone are not proof that something comes from God.
Every voice must be tested.
Every experience must be examined.
And everything must ultimately lead back to God.
This became the turning point of my journey.
Self-Deliverance and Returning to God Through Christ
That night became one of the most life-changing moments of my journey.
After everything I had experienced, I cried out to Jesus Christ with sincerity.
I was no longer searching for extraordinary experiences. I was searching for the truth.
Instead of seeking answers from other forces, I needed to seek God Himself.
That was when I began to understand the work of the Holy Spirit.
Learning to Listen The Holy Spirit
After being saved from spiritual attacks, my life did not change instantly.
The transformation happened gradually.
Step by step.
Day by day.
The confusion slowly became clearer.
The fear became less overwhelming.
The peace I had been searching for began replacing the chaos I had carried.
There were still difficult moments, but I no longer felt completely lost.
I also noticed that some of my memories became selective.
I questioned why certain moments were difficult to remember.
Through prayer, I came to understand that healing sometimes happens gradually. Some things become easier to process as we become stronger.
And God works in our midst.
Whether others understand that experience or not, it helped me continue moving forward.
Walking with God
As I continued praying and reading the Bible consistently, I noticed God opening one opportunity after another.
One message that stayed deeply within me came from Genesis:
“Let there be light.”
Those words became meaningful because they marked the beginning of my journey of seriously studying Scripture.
Later, I was accepted into a school whose motto was:
“Fiat Lux,” meaning “Let there be light.”
To me, this was a powerful reminder of the message from Genesis and the way God was guiding my path.
Then more opportunities began appearing.
Some were connected to my career.
Others were unexpected opportunities that I never imagined would happen.
Some doors opened in areas where I once felt overlooked.
Yet they opened at the right time.
I believe God provided opportunities that no person could have created for me.
Because of my busy schedule, I could not always share everything with my family.
Then another unexpected opportunity came.
I became a published author.
Publishing a book was never something I originally planned, but it became possible.
An ultimate goal I had for years was also achieved.
Some people can only wonder what my goal truly is, their curiosity piquing their interest.
However, only God knows where I am now. How was I able to achieve all these? It is all because of God, our Father, the Almighty Creator. After surrendering to Him, my life gradually changed… my beliefs, my knowledge, and my life. Even I myself couldn’t grasp it.
But that change may be gradual; it just came unexpectedly.
Looking back, I see that these things did not happen according to my own timing.
They happened according to God’s timing.
A Life Changed by Grace
Today, I continue experiencing a deeper relationship with God.
The voice I recognize is not an audible voice, but an inner whisper. It is a quiet conviction within my spirit that guides me toward truth, peace, and God.
Because of everything I have experienced, I have become more careful and more discerning.
However, I have also learned that true discernment must always be guided by humility, wisdom, and faith.
I no longer seek answers only through my own understanding.
Instead, I seek God first.
Looking back over the years, I am amazed by how much has changed.
Dreams that once confused me now carry a different meaning.
The convictions of the Holy Spirit continue to guide me.
The opportunities God has provided continue reminding me that His plans are greater than my own.
I began seeing them from a different perspective.
One important lesson God taught me is that there is something far more valuable than being recognized by the world.
True fulfillment does not come from success, wealth, or approval from others.
It comes from knowing God and understanding the purpose He has prepared.
Through Jesus Christ, I found salvation.
Through Christ, I came to know the Holy Spirit.
Through God’s Word, I began discovering truth.
For the first time in my life, I started reading the Bible consistently… not because of obligation, but because I genuinely wanted to know God.
The world may still bring challenges.
People may still misunderstand me.
Difficult seasons may still come.
But I have experienced a peace that I cannot fully explain.
Problems that once controlled my thoughts no longer have the same power over me.
The fears, confusion, and battles I carried for years have slowly been replaced with faith, understanding, and hope.
Since surrendering my life to God through Jesus Christ, I have experienced moments of grace, guidance, and blessings that I never expected.
Today, others may look at my life and think I am still in the same place.
They may question my progress, my choices, or my worth.
But they cannot see the transformation that has happened within me.
Only those who have seen me grow have access to the truth I carry now.
Some battles were invisible.
Some victories were known only between God and me.
Only God truly knows how much my life has changed.
No human being could have given me the peace, purpose, and direction I found through Him.
Achievements, recognition, and success cannot replace the relationship I have with God.
Everything I have today is because of His grace.
Even when challenges come, and even when others may not understand my journey, I know that God remains with me.
That is why I remain grateful.
My journey is not finished.
There are still lessons to learn, challenges to overcome, and opportunities ahead.
But now I move forward with faith, hope, and confidence, knowing that God continues to guide me according to His purpose.
The experiences I have lived through… from childhood struggles, dreams, confusion, searching, and finally finding peace… have shaped who I am today.
The gift of lucid dreaming and spiritual discernment is not about being different or being above others.
It is about learning, growing, and understanding that every experience must lead us closer to truth.
For me, that truth is found in Jesus Christ.
I can access God through Christ.
And for that, I am forever grateful.